may-widge

A week ago tomorrow, I was at perhaps the best wedding I've ever been to, including my own. And I think my wife will agree. Why was this the best wedding I've ever been to, you ask? Allow me to share with you three highlights.

Highlight #1: The wedding was outdoors in a grassy area, with the bridal party standing on a short but steep hill and the guests sitting on a flat area at the base of the hill. The fun part was that the bridesmaids all had spiked heels. I personally have only walked in the grass in spiked heels once or twice, but from what I remember, it's a bear. Add to that the short but steep hill that the bridal party had to scale, and you have quite a gauntlet. No one actually fell (in this part of the wedding), but the guests did cheer for each bridesmaid as they walked down the hill at the end of the ceremony.

Highlight #2: Sir Mix-a-Lot's "Baby Got Back". Played during the reception. As requested by the groom. Followed by a rush to change the song, followed again by a collective hiss from the crowd when it had indeed been changed.

Highlight #3 (save the best for last): The best highlight of all? Watching one of the bridesmaids faint. Twice. The first time was best, because not only did she faint, but she also ROLLED DOWN THE HILL. I kid you not. It was the best thing I'd ever seen at a wedding. I told my wife that I wish we had thought of having that at our own. Though the bridesmaid(unfortunately) didn't roll down the hill the second time, it was still a pretty good one as well, since she was standing up there obviously embarrassed, hiding her head behind the bouquet - until fate struck yet again. As she was standing with her head hidden, you could see the bouquet slowly lower until you could see her eyes, rolling back into her head just moments before she slumped into the arms of another bridesmaid. Did I mention that the bride pointed and laughed? And through it all, the girl singing kept belting it out, not missing a beat. I loved every moment.





A disclaimer: If you are reading this and happen to be someone who was intimately involved with the wedding, my apologies. I actually had a really good time (as you might be able to tell), plus I thought the food was awesome and the ceremony was [insert here some adjective that a man can use to describe a wedding in a positive way without sound effeminate]. And I liked that the ceremony was outdoors. And not overly long. There, hopefully I've redeemed myself.